Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I have fence marks all over my body
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
