so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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