So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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