I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
