It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
