think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Randomize
