After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Randomize
