Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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