In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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