Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Randomize
