ya dads aren't the best wingmen
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize