life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
