Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
