Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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