O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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