So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
