hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
