You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
