He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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