Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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