But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
