honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
