whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
a search helicopter?!
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Randomize
