Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I enjoy the company of your penis
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