This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
