i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
