A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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