My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
whose ass print is on the piano?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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