Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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