if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
