the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
