Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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