She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
