Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
im holly from the hills drunk
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
i've created a new STD.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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