return my video game
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
