Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
