I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
