So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
