Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
