Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
