Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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