i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
