I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize