So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize