girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
