Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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