Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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