come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Reggie can tackle my bush.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
