He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize