she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
